My story involves the Ian Anderson House hospice in Oakville. My husband Gary was transferred to Ian Anderson House for his final two weeks of care before he died of a glioblastoma multiforme brain tumour.
I was caring for him at home and finding it increasingly difficult because he could not walk or speak, and he could also not lift his body to help with daily functions. We were so lucky to be admitted to the hospice because at that time there were only six or seven beds, and the only other hospice nearby was Carpenter House in Burlington, and it was full.
When we arrived, Gary was made clean and comfortable and began smiling again, even though he knew that his time on earth was quickly approaching. The staff at Ian Anderson were so compassionate and kind. They encouraged me to let them take care of Gary and for me to just relax and be there for him.
The room was so bright and comfortable, and the atmosphere was calm and quiet. Volunteers would come by to see if they could bring me a cup of tea and some cookies. We were allowed guests at any time and there was no limit as to the number of visitors. My daughter’s little dog was even allowed to come and lay on his bed.
The nursing staff let me know what to watch for as the end was nearing so that I was able to stay overnight with him and be there when he finally succumbed. There were no interventions, and it was a calm, gentle leaving with his loved ones at his side.
I have nothing but warm feelings for the hospice experience and we desperately need one in Milton. It is where I want to be at the end of my life, and I encourage everyone to support the fundraising efforts of the Townsend-Smith Foundation.
When we are born, we have no say in the circumstances surrounding our birth. Some of us arrive in a hospital surrounded by bright lights, medical equipment, and highly educated professionals. Some arrive at home in an inflatable pool with family, a midwife or doula to welcome us. A few even arrive in the back of a car! But when it comes to our death, I would like to think we should have a little more say in our departure from this life if at all possible.
When my friend was at the end of her life, after valiantly living with colon cancer for a few years, she was fortunate enough to be able to make the decision to go to a wonderful hospice in Guelph for her final days. It was a few minutes’ drive away. She loved her husband, son, three daughters, baby granddaughter, and two dogs. She loved her home. But she was tired and didn’t want them to be responsible for her last days. She needed their love not their untrained ‘nursing’ abilities. She needed them strong not stressed, well rested not exhausted. She took great comfort in knowing that they could come whenever and for as long as they wanted, and the baby could be with her as fit the baby’s schedule. Her friends were welcome, the staff was warm, friendly, and well trained in the special needs at end of life. There was food and hot drinks, and all was calm. It was the best solution for her and for all of us who loved her.
Without a hospice the choice is twofold, stay home and it all falls on your family, or go to hospital where your family takes on visitor status, with paid parking, regulated hours and limits on numbers. Hospice should be available as the third choice. North Halton needs this facility, and the Townsend Smith Foundation needs our support to make it a reality. Come out on May 13th to hike with us or lend us your financial support and we’ll hike for you and for all our future ‘dying days’.
“We have resided in Milton since 1970 and have witnessed the small town grow and flourish. But something is still missing. To complete our compassionate community, we need The Townsend Smith Hospice. We know from our firsthand experiences how draining the last days of a dying family member can be on the family and the caregivers. That is why we are sponsoring a “Family Room”. In a time of sadness, a hospice can be a positive and calming place. Family and friends can have quality time during the last days with their loved one because physical, emotional and spiritual support is available from staff and volunteers. We remember how physically and emotionally difficult it was for mother to care for father during his last days and hours at home. We have also seen how a hospice provides relief. The time came for a dear friend to move to a hospice and the relief was immediate. The family was relieved because now their loved one had 24-hour care and would not be alone. Caregivers could drop that role and become husband, daughters, sisters, and friends again. The patient herself was comfortable in her homey bedroom and she had some control of how she would spend her last days. We are looking forward to seeing the Townsend Smith Hospice become a reality in providing comfort, respite, emotional and spiritual support to those in need and their families.” – Joe and Zina Yaworski
Sonia Pedulla shares why hospice and palliative care is so important to our community and why raising money in her mom’s name has meant so much.
“On behalf of the Pedulla family we would like to thank everyone for their generous donations in memorial of Sylvia. Sylvia was a loving wife, mother and grandmother (Nonna). She was a kind, caring and a giving woman. Her house was always open to all and always filled with family and friends. This cause meant a lot to her as not many families are as fortunate as her to have been at home and in close proximity to all her loved ones. We are so grateful to have raised this money so we can help palliative patients be as close to their families as Sylvia was to hers. Having a hospice in town gives these patients the palliative care they need and still be with their loved ones . Sylvia always did what she could to help our community, she was a very special lady, she was touched by many and loved by all. By raising this money as one last thing in her honour would have meant the world to her. “ – Sonia Pedulla
“Caring, Peaceful, Loving” This is how we describe my husband’s end of life at a hospice. We don’t have any comparisons but as a family we agree that everyone should have access to what we experienced. To help realize this for others facing a loved one’s death, we were committed to sharing our experience and helping financially in the new building of a new hospice in Alliston. A recent donation in memory of a good friend to the Townsend Smith Hospice Foundation sparked a request to share our family’s experiences when our beloved poppa died at Mathews House Hospice in Alliston. We truly experienced their motto “A life lived fully and a death with dignity”.
At the time of Richard’s sudden terminal cancer diagnosis, we had not known about both what was in store and how impactful the hospice staff and services would be. They ensured his well-being up until the end as well as our family’s ability to cope during and afterwards. Right after the diagnosis, the staff provided us support while we absorbed and processed our situation and plans. Over the next six months, the hospice would become our go-to for information and counselling with the decisions we were making.
A wonderful and enduring memory was the family conferencing evening mediated by one of the staff. It was a time of frank discussion with everyone having a chance to ask questions and build a shared understanding about what laid ahead. The meeting helped us move forward with the case management, preparation of advanced care direction, decision for DNR and professional assistance to navigate the health care system. When the time came, I was able to sleep and be with him and family could come to visit at the hospice. The nurses, volunteers and palliative care doctors were wonderful, kind and caring. Follow up care for me was available and appreciated.
The impact of our financial contribution which included buying one of the beds was recently highlighted when a dear friend mentioned having seen our family’s donation acknowledgement on the bed that their loved one was occupying. It brought home how our donation was continuing to give to others in ways that we could not have imagined. I encourage others to make donations to support the Townsend-Smith Hospice being built for the North Halton community. One never knows when it might be needed and everyone deserves to experience a peaceful end of life.
